Advice for FriendsSeptember 8, 2011
I recently ran across Scott Grossberg’s blog. It’s an incredibly positive and affirming blog. Most recently it was about giving advice to friends, only it had a twist (click the link above to read the actual blog post.).
The blog asked that the reader think of 5 friends and then write down what advice you’d give each friend that would make their lives better. So, I wrote the following:
Friend 1: Let go of the need to be in control.
Friend 2: Let go of the fear of the past.
Friend 3: Follow through on the goals you set for your life.
Friend 4: Let go of bitterness.
Friend 5: Be more flexible and open to change.
All good advice, right? Well, here’s the twist; the advice is really for the reader. Wait, what? That advice is for me?? Hmm.
The next step was to write the advice for the friend in a present tense sentence for myself. So, I wrote:
I release the outcome of the things in my life.
I live confidently and openly.
I follow through on my commitments.
I send love and light to those who have hurt me and release them.
I am flexible and open to change.
I have to say, I had not realized how much bitterness I still hold about my last partner. But this exercise called it into crystal clear view. That is definitely an area where I need to work in order to truly release him.
As I moved through this exercise, it really wasn’t hard to see the things I listed as areas for improvement in my friends lives, were actually areas where “I,” too, need work. Seeing the faults in others, is really seeing the faults in ourselves – frustrations I have with others’ behavior may actually be the behaviors I need to release. Powerful food for thought.
What is the one thing in others that makes you crazy? Could it really be what’s in you?
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